This will help you not only know the point of view of parenting children of varying ages, but It’s going to offer some great ideas that you can implement into your own family and household.
Parenting for my daughter and I was single parenting for a very long time. Then we found love, then came marriage and then the baby with the baby carriage. It wasn’t just that easy, but I’ll save that for another blog down the road.
In 2015 after parenting solo (not to discount all the family and friends who helped along the way) but officially we became a family. In 2016 when my daughter was almost 10 years old, we welcomed a newborn into the family.
Now a day’s it’s finding the balance as a toddler Mom, while also balancing the many changes that teenagers endure.
I offer 5 tips that can be applied to any household but specifically this is what has worked for us!!
Don’t get me wrong I don’t have it all figured out we still have threenager tantrums, and teenager battles!! But these tips have helped us find a healthy balance.
A. Patience, Patience, Patience
(this is number one for a reason)
B. Flexibility (no I’m not talking about Yoga)
Learn Each Family Member’s Love Language
Find out what is most important for your Family and most importantly know your child’s love language. One of my children’s main love language is speaking nice things and acts of service. The other child as of right now feels loved with buying things(prizes)and time. I know these can change as they grow so it’s important to define what they are at each stage. Example: My oldest feels extremely loved and her cup is filled when I run into her room and make her bed for her, or clean her bathroom sink, fold some of her laundry serving her breakfast. The youngest loves being surprised with a dump truck, a treasure box to pick from or time spent together playing.
Stacey Balancing Parenting to a Toddler and a Teenager
Emphasize Family as Priority
Regardless of the age gap-FAMILY is still the #1 priority-at this stage and also having the oldest participate in shared parenting with another home it is EXTREMELY important at this stage we instill FAMILY VALUES and that they are siblings and no matter how much you want to you can’t change that.
Don’t take things too seriously in parenting. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying to not keep your children safe I’m talking-SILLY!! Wear Christmas pajamas at Easter, and let your children be silly and balance one another. The 3-year-old loves playing hide and seek (in the house) and the teenager still finds it fun too. So, although I am not always for playing this inside the house it is a way for them to form a bond through playing while also feeling free to be themselves with one another. They also love to play water activities whether it’s swimming, throwing water balloons or running together at the beach it’s very important to still find things to do together that they can enjoy one another while also having fun as children.
DIVIDE AND CONQUER
This right here!!!! Probably most parents of multiple children will agree. Whether it’s during softball season which we dearly miss and one parent is coaching and the other is chasing and entertaining the toddler. It’s ok for both parents and children to be at the same place and entertain each of them on different levels. It helps each parent still have their own bond with their children while also doing things together as a family. Examples: My son (the threenager) and I will take trips to the parks, run or partake in outside activities while the oldest will go practice softball with the other parent. My daughter and I will go off to get pedicures, shopping, movies etc. while the younger stays with the other parent and plays outside digging or building mud pies or airplanes out of wood.
Toddler tantrums are equal to taking a teenager’s phone away. The same results!
With hope’s this has offered some help or insight for you guys!
Love and Light,